In Case You Haven’t Found That Perfect Christmas Gift

Just in case you’ve run out of gift ideas, I bring you these ridiculous  novel inventions:

1.  Phone Fingers.   For those discriminating iPhone users who don’t like to violate their screen with their own fingerprints.

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2.  Picnic Pants.  Instead of getting bread crumbs on your lap, you get them on your other lap.

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3.  Exhaust Hamburger Cooker.  A fun way to include engine exhaust in your next meal.

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4.  Butter Stick.  Think of all the knives you won’t have to wash.

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5.  Lipstick Assistant.  There’s an inventor somewhere with way too much time on her hands.  Or no access to a mirror.

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6.  Pet Petter.  When that new relationship includes a pet.  Can also use for the kids.

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Strange Holiday Traditions

When you think about it, our western Christmas traditions are pretty weird.  If we told anyone who didn’t know the tradition that we haul fir trees into our living room, string lights on it and wait for a bearded old man to fall down our chimney we would be considered slightly deranged.  With that in mind, I give you other strange holiday traditions around the world.

1.  Japan.  Forget a Christmas turkey.  Folks in Japan eat–wait for it–Kentucky Fried Chicken.  If they choose to dine out, reservations must be made because the demand is so great. (I wonder how popular KFC is the other 364 days of the year. )

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Finger-lickin’ good Christmas dinner, Japanese style.

 

2.  Spain.   In Catalonia they celebrate Christmas with Caga Tío, or the Pooping Log.  A log is hollowed out, little legs are stuck on and a face is painted on its flat surface. Beginning December 8, Caga is “fed” and covered with a blanket.  On Christmas, Caga is beaten with a stick and ordered to poop.  He obliges by eliminating figs, nuts, and small candles, with the final offering being a herring, onion or garlic.  When he’s given his all, poor Caga ends up in the fireplace.

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They poop their hearts out for us.

3.  Caracas.  Church-goers attend church faithfully between December 16 and 24.  Not unusual in itself, but these folks go on roller-skates. Accoriding to this site,

The streets are blocked off to vehicular traffic until 8 am and children, the night before, tie one end of a piece of string to their big toes and hang the other end out the window. As roller skaters go by the next morning, they give a tug to all the strings hanging out the windows.

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Get me to the church on time.

4.  Austria:  Alpine countries like Austria celebrate something called Krampus Night.  Sometime in early December, a beast-like creature stalks the streets to punish children who have been naughty, carrying them away to his lair in his sack. There is some debate as to whether this tradition is appropriate for children.  Yah think?

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Krampus beast coming to a neighbourhood near you.

 

Let it snow, let it snow, let it–NOT.

It was lovely at first.  Christmas morning, large fluffy snow flakes coming down.  Before long, the world was coated in white.

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Purty snow taken with my iPhone, Christmas Day.

Then I got over it.

Boxing Day (day after Christmas, for those who don’t know) it was still snowing.  Ordinarily, this wouldn’t be a problem, except for the fact that the idiot property maintenance people I hired neglected to add me to their snow removal list.  It took two phone calls and a great deal of agitation to get the goof to clear my driveway.  At 1:00 in the morning.  And he did a crappy job.

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Blurry blizzard in the works, Boxing Day.

Today, I set about to do my chores and poof–there goes my windshield wipers.  Dang.  (I must admit that it was my fault; I get impatient waiting for the defrost to work, and work the wipers while they’re still stuck to the window.)  Off I go to find a full service gas station, and to my dismay discover that there aren’t any–at least I couldn’t find any.  So I decided to visit the car dealership across town (driving all the while through snow covered windows), and of course their service department was closed.  The salesman suggested I go to Canadian Tire (which is also across town) and by this time I think I’m pressing my luck.  Is that two-foot pile of snow on my roof  going to decide to plop down on the windshield NOW?   It didn’t–and  Canadian Tire put on my new blades and fixed up the screwed wipers.  Yay Canadian Tire.

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Kudos to CT for fixing my wipers so fast.

When I got home, I continued painting my kitchen.  I’m using Annie Sloan chalk paint and I love it.

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Kitchen in transit

Again, crappy photo but you get the gist.

Until next time, stay warm!